Obama

Is a closet Republican.  Cuts government employees pay, forgives Michael Vick and could care about starving kids in the US.  I did NOT vote for him based on I didn't think he was telling the truth in the first place.  He was too smooth a talker and he has not kept one of his promises except those that hurt the government worker.  That's why Oprah wanted him in office, to cut HER taxes.

There was a sign on a house that I pass going home every day.  It went like this:

One
Big
Ass
Mistake
America

I hated that sign...until now.  Unfortunately, the people have moved and took the sign with them.  I still say, blame Oprah, she threw her money behind his support and it's turning out to be a mistake.

My Mom.

The daughter mentioned before cannot figure her mom out to save her life.  We went to store and couldn't find everything I needed and I had to kind of use my memory for the ingrediants.  We must have walked back and forth the full length of the store about 5 times.  Since everything was not there we needed to go to the store that had it, so we just made fun of the store, got what we wanted then went to other store.

We got to that store and was told by another customer that the store was closing in 4 minutes.  I just wanted one back of Pepe Ancici pasta so I could make Frog Eye.  Nobody needed to know that.  We walk into the store and the cashier says, "We close in four minutes."  I told him I know, so we got what we needed and made fun of everything and everybody in the store along the way.

For instance as we are walking into the store there's a really BIG sign that says "Open 24 Hours".  but they were closing in 4 minutes.  So which is it, they are closing in 4 minutes or they are open 24 hours?  They deserved to be made fun of.

I need to lose weight.

And then the drive home brought more picking on people, laughing and ho ho hoing all the way home!  We just didn't have a sleigh and that was probably a good thing.  We'd get pulled over for drunken sleighing and would have been totally sober.

The conversation while going to the other store was Drunken Raisin's.  We both read the article, but not together, and that left the inventor open to all kinds of stuff.  BUT I want to try them because of my back.  That would lead to drinking and driving.  How do you explain to a cop that your not drunk driving, that the only thing you had was a few raisins.  There was more back and fourth until she was talking about an undrunk date.  I still can't figure out if she was talking about the plum-date or some guys undrunk Date.  She was laughing so hard at her own joke I just didn't get it. At least she cracked herself up!

Trying to figure me out isn't all that hard.  It's about LAUGHTER an having a good time.  I maybe old but I ain't dead!  :)

Merry Christmas.

Santa Claus

The other day my daughter and I were shopping, again, for some last minute stuff for the grandsons (her sons).  We were talking about when her younger sister was told about Santa Claus.  I told her the reason we had to tell her sister was because of her and her brothers big mouths telling her he didn't exists and we (the parents) were telling them he did exist, it was driving the younger sister crazy.  She was asking to many questions. 

Fast forward a few days, (tonight) we go to the store so I can pick up some last minute things for dinner tomorrow.  She has the NERVE to tell me to hurry up, that we have to get home because Santa Claus is coming tonight.  Short memory span so I informed her that I WAS Santa.  Remember, the talk we had about the younger sister, having to tell her who Santa was?  She does have a short memory.  So now it all fit into place for her.  She kept calling me Santa.

So I had to set the name straight at this time. It's Mrs. Claus or in my case, Ms. Claus.

Merry Christmas!

Fix your own small dents?

This is kind of cool.  I got it in a Jokeroo 'newsletter' today.

http://www.jokeroo.com/videos/cool/fixing-dent-canned-air.html

There are no other instructions.

Donate a kidney or not

Steve and Slacker on 105.9, Alice were talking about donating a kidney.  I didn't hear the whole show but Steve and Slacker were asking callers if they were compatible and each needed a kidney which DJ would they give it too.  My vote is, sell it on craigslist.  No way would I give my kidney to anybody outside of family.  Dorks.

Another commercial, unintentional porn?

GMC 403 horsepower 6-2 V8 Nutcracker?  2011 Sierra.  I don't think it was unintentional.  Broncos/raiders game.

Only in America...

where we can afford to renovate a National Monument for $8 MILLION dollars and $365 MILLION to renovate the White House and have children starving in America.  I KNOW this is true that we have kids starving.  We can pay more taxes for the luxuries of the Rich and Famous (the Obama administration) but nothing is said about our starving children.  Guess when there are NO american's left to pay the taxes then we won't be able to pay for stupid stuff...
http://www.strength.org/childhood_hunger/hunger_facts/  Help if you can.
They want to stamp out childhood hunger by 2015.  THIS SHOULD NOT BE HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!  This should be stopped before the end this year.  Yeah there's only so many days left but guess what?  We are a supposed super power and we don't even take care of our own.  What a worthless country we are that we don't take care of our own first.

More commercials...

One that makes me shake my head and wonder what the commercial is REALLY about?  Ricola and the dancers. 

The Biggest Loser in trouble because of the recession?

So does the recession cause obesity or is the Biggest Loser going to lose contestants because of the recession?

My thoughts, it doesn't matter.  If anything it will cause obesity because the foods that are bad for us are the ones that are the cheapest and that is barely affordable.  For instance, in my opinion, pasta is the WORST food but the most affordable.

A lot of these foods that are affordable are NOT on a diabetic diet.  So they choice is eat crappy, high calorie, high carb food or starve cause the other food isn't affordable.

Here's a challenge from Biggest Loser:

http://www.pfpchallenge.com/

We can feed somebody just by loosing weight.  By the way DENVER don't even make the top 5 of the top losers for Colorado.  Better get on it.   Yeah, yeah, I know, we don't have enough over weight people to rate that high, right?  :)

Oprah TV

I just realized that Oprah has a big chunk of day time TV.  All of these shows are on really close to the same time, Dr. Phil (idiot), Dr. Oz (my hero) and then Oprah herself.  I know Nate has a cable show, who else has Oprah given permission to put their show on the air?  HER own OWN (Oprah Winfey Network) starts on the first day in January.  Before you know it she'll be running the country from behind a camera.  No, I don't believe it, I'm just feeding into paranoid people's thoughts.  :)

Head lights and tail lights

There are a lot of headlights and tail lights out on cars.  Mine aren't ALL out but a lot of them are out.  And on a Mustang you practically have to take the car apart to replace them.  But I can do it!

To check to see if they all work I found the perfect window to check them in.  It's at the college for cosmetology on the corner of 66th and Wadsworth.  LOTS of window.  So I can back in and check my tail lights and pull in to see the head lights.  PERFECT.

Check your lights...it's better than getting a ticket and safer for all of us.

Internet commercials

Google Chrome.  Tired of it.  Almost any video I want to see has THAT commercial on it.  I have Chrome but refuse to use it and won't upgrade it.

This doesn't come as a shock...

Father kills his two kids.  I just don't see why this has to happen.  Take the kids some where it's safe and let some one else raise them.  Death is NOT an option.

http://www.cnn.com/2010/CRIME/12/11/alabama.children.remains/index.html?hpt=T2

There's a really cute commercial on the radio.

One of the few that I like and I cannot remember it.  Darn, it's good too.

December 11, 2010
I remember now.  It's a Progressive commercial, on the radio.  What's cute about it is the background singer's.   Somebody is asking questions, another person is answering and the background singers are putting in their two cents worth.

It's like a caller calls in and asks a question.  It's supposed to be about insurance but one guy says, 'the instructions on my shampoo says wash, rinse, repeat.  How many times should I repeat?'
The announer says, 'Oh, I think you called the wrong help line.'
The background singers, all together, sing, 'Twice is enough.'  It's really cute.
That's the new version.  The older version the announcer asks the singers something like are you making fun of me and the singers, all together again, go 'Kinda'.

It's better if you could hear the whole thing but they don't play the whole commercial any more.  Still an excellent commercial.  The best part is it isn't every other commercial.  At least I don't hear it every time.  Excellent commercial!

Stuff has been happening all week.

But I'm tired and my back is killing me so I don't have a whole lot to say.  So I'll wait until I'm off drugs to write.  Or maybe not.  Ha, I don't have anything to say and that is NOT me.  I'm on a muscle relaxant and a pain med and LOTS of ibuprofen.  So until later.

Pearl Harbor Day

Another American tragedy.  Not to be forgotten.

Went to Walgreen's this afternoon to get a prescription filled.

So you know while you are waiting for them to take the prescription you look around to see what specials they have going on.  Walgreens always has sales.  But I was tickled that they had a Flu Shot Gift Card.  It was for $29.99.  A little expensive but what better way to say I love you than a free shot.  Awww.

How embarassing is it?

to get fired in front of the whole Nation?  Like Josh McDaniels.
Just like how embarrassing is it for everybody in the Nation to know that your house went into foreclosure?  Like the space ship house on the mountain.  The one in the movie 'Sleeper'?  When that house went into foreclosure EVERYBODY knew.

Did you know?

That you can turn your explorer sideways?  Hit ctrl + alt + the arrow you want to change it to.  Like upside down is  ctrl + alt + down arrow turns it totally upside down.  Cool huh?

Wanna know how I found this out?  A six month old fuzzy butted KITTEN walked across my key board.  So I had to look up how to turn it back.

Worthless information.  Doesn't do any good unless maybe your looking at pictures, maybe.  But fun to play with.

Josh McDaniels Fired...

Yee haw.  That's enough said.

Most hated commercials...

Not because they aren't good but because they show them so many times they lost their funniness YEARS ago.  Geico.  All of them.

Watching football...

I watch the Broncos and I get verbal.  My cat, Loki, doesn't like it when I'm too loud.  He'll meow at me with his eyes closed like he's yelling at me to 'shaddap'.  I love that stupid cat.

If I sneeze he yells too.  Sensitive snot nose brat.

Another "What the Heck?" When did killing your kids become an option?

Don't want your kids any more?  Just kill them.  When did that become an option?  Recent news has been filled with parents killing their kids, hiding the bodies and acting like its NORMAL to do that.  Is there no thought before the parent kills?  Not only are the snuffing the life of a child they are going to go to prison for the rest of their lives.  If you can't take care of your kids then give them to some one who will, like Social Services or the local fire department.  I know Safe Haven (I'm against it) is for new borns but what about the older child who needs to be protected?  DEATH is NOT an option. 

Because a person can't take care of their child(ren) there's no reason to kill them.  Take them to a responsible adult, like a cop, a social worker, a fireman.  Let them live.

I know the economy has a lot to do with it but damn, death to an innocent child is a stiff penalty to pay for being a child.

Letting a child live with another family is not a sign of failure, it's a sign of strength.  Killing of children has got to STOP!

Bumper cars

I drive on a section of I-70 that can be very dangerous and has had some really BAD accidents.  If you've only had a couple of beers, stay off that highway.  It will take your life.  For example, a year or so back and lady had been drinking, came around that corner (it's by the Lakeside lakes and the one across the street of Lakeside or the Sheridan exit) plowed into the guard rail and killed her 3 year old child.  I think it was a girl.  Then another car did the same thing but for some reason ALL of the people in the car left the scene and was found at a house close by.  What the heck?

Ok, so coming back from taking my daughter to work I see these guard rails the at exit on Pecos are all torn up.  The cones are all over the place, etc.  Do people think those things are soft?  Do they think they are bumpers in case you miss the turn?  How can you possibly hit those things, tear them up and live to tell about it?  It wasn't that way last night when we went by so it happened between 8:00 pm and 9:00 am. 

Why do people drive like that?  Pet peeve of mine.

The New Colorado Blinker

Coloradan's VERY RARELY use their blinkers.  I space it out and get yelled at by my kids but I've been driving in this state for a very long time.  I can remember when I-25 was called the Valley Highway.  I actually saw a map on Google (which I don't use) that said Valley Highway.  Am I ADD, yes.

So I'm taking the daughter to work, which I should pack a lunch because she works in North Castle rock, almost, and this beat up truck kept moving lanes without a blinker.  I'm pretty sure that by the condition of the truck, barely road legal, that those blinkers don't work.  So I told my daughter that I was letting this guy in front of me because he wanted out of the lane he was in because of merging traffic onto the highway, just like he merged on.  She said something about how could I tell that.  I told her he was using his new Colorado blinkers.

Yeah, she did the same thing, Huh?  I told her the new blinker was:  when you see somebody looking to their left twice, or more, in succession that means he is coming over, clear road or not.  His head moves at the same rate as a blinker would.  That constitutes a valid defense in traffic court, right?  "But your honor I looked TWICE before I moved over."

What happens if they want to turn right?  They look to the right at least twice or in their rear view mirror at least twice and/or at the mirror on the outside on the door at least twice, again in succession as a real blinker.  And then they start riding the line.

If they only look once?  They aren't from Colorado.  Or they are sight seeing.  More than three times?  Insecure driver.

Riding the line is an East coast thing.  They expect you to read their minds (not much reading there) and to either speed up or slow down.  If youi speed up they move right behind you BARELY missing your car.  It's almost a PIT manuever.

New word Drining.  That's a combination of Drinking and Driving...  :)  Which I do neither.

My mean cat.

This isn't thoughts, this is reality.
My cat is such a snot.  I was sitting here surfing and I kept hearing this noise.  It kept getting more and more obnoxious then I realized it was the smallest dog throwing a fit.  She was whining.  She wanted to go down the hall to the bedroom, which is stupid because she never leaves the room that I'm in but her water is down the hall too.  She couldn't do it because Loki, the cat, was blocking the hallway.  MOST of the dogs are afraid of him because he can be mean and will tear them apart.  His favorite thing to do is to wait till Jack (my favorite dog) walks by him then with one swipe plants his claws in Jack's butt.  All of the sudden Jack screams and tries to go after Loki.  I have to stop him before he eats the cat.  So Loki's laying there flipping his tail cause he knows it bothers the dog, Autumn, and he's just being a snot.  Flipping the tail is a 'na na na boo boo stick your head in do-do' type teasing.   I get up to go move him because yelling at him doesn't do any good and I reach down to pick up him and all I see is claws and paws as he's trying to stop me from moving him.  He has 4 of them and all the claws are sharpened for any kill he can get, including my arm.   I finally got hold of his body and picked him up.  He hates kisses worse than anything so after I pick him up he stops fighting cause he knows I'm going to kiss his mean little face.  He's such a brat.

Sulphuric Acid spill.

So there's a chemial spill on I-25 and Colorado Boulevard.  Another good thing for the light rail to be around, my daughter sailed right by it on her way to work.

Turns out that a trucker slammed on her brakes and broke a drum in the back.  It was sulphuric acid.  The highway was shut down for 11 (depends on which news station you listened to) or 10 hours.  So this is the topic of discussion on the way home.  You can see the story here:  http://www.9news.com/rss/article.aspx?storyid=167473

Ok, so the conversation from there goes something like this:
Sulphuric acid smells like rotten eggs.  Is highly corrosive.  What is it used for?  Nobody could answer that question.

At that moment we discussed how it could get into water and kill everything in it.  I ask, 'Do you think we could get Obama to swim in that water?  Like he did with his daughters in the oil spill waters?'  The answer was, 'Nah, he'd then be Michael Jackson.'  OUCH!  We laughed really hard.

What I was thinking was this:

DEAR LORD, THIS YEAR YOU TOOK MY FAVORITE ACTOR, PATRICK SWAYZIE. YOU TOOK MY FAVORITE ACTRESS, FARAH FAWCETT. YOU TOOK MY FAVORITE SINGER, MICHAEL JACKSON. I JUST WANTED TO LET YOU KNOW, MY FAVORITE PRESIDENT IS BARACK OBAMA. AMEN

:)

I hate T-mobile

I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile,I hate T-mobile, Been with them for 5 years and they are STILL screwing me over.

Its early thirty and I can't sleep.

I'm tired but I can't sleep.

My daughter says I'm funnier.

My daughter says I'm funnier than the guy from $..! My Dad Says.  I don't know about that but I think she's referring to the fruit cake incident/award.

I'm still wondering how to pay my house off.

It consumes a lot of my time...that thought.

I wonder how I can get my home paid off.

Just a thought.